Train **pre recreation**

She needs the sounds of the train yards to get her by in this life.
Although the thought of brush strokes make her feel like puking the smell of paint is the sweetest fragrance to her.
She loves standing toes edge against the rail and smelling the newest art encasing those train carts.
You see the way that spray paint tickles her nose it makes her dream harder than when she sleeps.
Dreams tangled with those she lusts for. Constantly lusting for those that will never love.
Artists mainly. Boy how she dreams about those artists she has surrounded herself with.
Dreaming, lusting, and loving those happiest moments experienced with one another.
Don't mistake this lust and love for just sexual attraction.
But there was one that she fell in love with for all the wrong reasons. She shouldn't have ever done such a thing to begin with.
Come and gone now.
With the most meaningful friends miles away now she is findinng herself seeking approval from maybe the oddest group.
The train yard guards.
They hold the key for her to stand toe to rail close when those carts roll in.
Eyes peeled wide open waiting for the newest hint of where these trains have been.
Even the slightest splash of unfamiliar colour gives her new hope.
Nose cleared so she can catch that sent.
Ears empty only in these moments so she can hear that whistle.
These steps make finding relationships with these unknown artists traveling this land so much more concrete.
Cause without paint, lust, love, and trains life just isn't complete.

**I had originally wrote this piece before "Train". I thought I had lost it and had tried recreating it to the best of my ability, but sometimes at 4:00am when you've lost something so amazing you can't manage to find those words again. Thank God I found them.