The Month Away From May

There had been one before you
One that had consumed many thoughts until that first conversation piece with you had started
Now she is hooked like a fish on the most experienced fishers line
Heart and head at moments are telling her the same things
Other moments head says, "Forget all these amazing feelings"
Heart is saying, "There is a reason for this great aching"
But you've got her on "Cloud Nine"
Which is such a plumetting high compared to wanting to be buried six feet under ground emotionally months ago
Here it is this month before May and she is questioning when it is you'll end up disappearing and going away
But this question only lingers in the moments when you are miles away

Distance

The mind can be ever so surprising.
I had thought I was starting to forget all about you.
Get rid of you.
Push you out of my memory.
I had been doing so great for so long.
Then today. A simple day.
There you were.
In my head.
I could've swore you were dead.
There had been moments were I willingly spoke of you.
And lately I had begun to feel nothing when speaking of you.
But today. God how today you made me feel everything without even doing anything.
Ruined such a good Sunday.
I was beginning to not even think of writing about you.
Writings of how I meant nothing to you.
Here I am again. Letting you consume all too much of my time.
Why can't I shake the slightest thought of you today.
Tomorrow I want you to be back in my head the way you had been the past few weeks.
When distant thoughts of you were better than any lusting thoughts of you
I just want to forget all about you now
That used to be the last thing I wanted to do
I am sick of being ruined by you
Consumed by you
I'm exhausted from these thoughts of you
Yet sleep is not insight.
And you should know I am all too over this fight.