I am discovering I must be disillusioned by what I think my relationships and importance within my friendships are.
Not only within my relationships with men romantically but in every relationship I am finding I am nothing but a mere convenience.
Months from now will you remember me. Will you wonder how I am as I wonder how you are my friends. I wish you safe travels. And knowing how I am I will try to check up on you during them and hope for a response
Some days maybe I am just feeling sorry for myself. But when I really think about these things I realize it is so much more than that at times.
There is proof to make such things facts.
Truly I want nothing more for things to be the way they were. Why can I just not stomach that they will not be that.
Change has come and I have no welcoming still for it.
Please don’t think I am unhappy for the things you are all getting in your lives. I just wish I could be apart of those lives.
For now I will stick to my books and music that floods my ears.
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